Tracelle and Dawn: The written existence
by Pursay
Summary: A little parody of Percy Jackson stories everywhere.. Read and enjoy. Comedy recipe: 5 cups of randomness, mixed in with TWO OCs, mixed in with twist and molested plot-bunnies. Serve with a side of fandom, and enjoy when bored. Beware! Ratings may go up!
1. The special beginning

**Author(s) note: This is story is for pure humor only, and it is not to bash OCs or bash cannon characters.. It's just a joke that me and my friend were doing lastnight. So, I don't want anyone chowfacing me\us in the reviews. Also, I'm not too familiar with the characters, so expect OOC and such.. :P Have fun, and thanks for reading!**

**Disclaimer: The rights, characters, ETC belongs to its respective owners. This story isn't made for profit, just pure craps and giggles. ****I\We own nothing but My\Our OCs Tracelle and Dawn. **

Once apon a time, In a faaaar away land, hidden beneath the dense forest somewhere near -_**New york, or something.. I don't know!-**_Rested a quaint little camp by the name of.. Camp Half-Blood! -_**Dun, dun, dun!-**_

Where all Supernatural people, young and old, male or female, roamed freely!** -**_**Like wild animals.. Or fangirls.. Whatevs..-**_

There was a young girl, whose name was Trace LeGrace **-W**_**hy LeGrace? Because! The author thought it'd be a nice name, get off my-**_Anyways! She was a extremely nice girl, who had been nothing but, _brave, understanding, caring, loving, impossibly gulible_ and gentle to all those around her.

But! One day.. When the sun was shining brightly, the birds were singing, and not one fangirl was twitching spazmatically out of place.. _**-You know.. **__**That**_** set,**_** that was taken straight out of cliché fairytale**_- There were two grumpy trolls looming about the camp..

One of the trolls was an very agitated brunette, her name was Annabeth Chase, and although she is normally described as a nice and pretty girl.. In this story! She's _-__**Meh, alright.. In my opinion**__- _No where near as pretty\nice as Trace!

What with her stupid brown hair, stupid tan skin, and retarded steely gray eyes. Oh! Her rotten attitude, and dead fish personality is probably the reason this might be the last we'll mention her.

_**-So now we talk of the 2nd troll, right?-**_

As for the second troll, she had ugly crossed eyes that were a nasty shade of hazel, her hair was a messy shoulder length tangle of _**-Why does this not sound familiar at all?- **_stupid honey blonde hair. And she had ugly freckles scattered across her unevenly tanned complexion.

**-**_**Wait, dude! That's me! Oh, that's cold! I thought you were my friend!-**_

But- Trace was easily prettier than both girls! And that's why she had been raising the eyebrows _**-among others things- **_of _**all **_the boys at camp.

Tracelle, Harmony-McHarkness, Legrace! _**-ALOT of words to shallow..- **_Had the most beautiful face, brightest clothes, oh yeah! And she was the daughter of _**-Give us a reprieve, please? I have to pee!-**_

"Oh, my gosh! Please! Stop interupting my story, Dawn!" Barked the young Trace, aforementioned in the story above.

"But- If I am to Beta read this literary debauchery, I atleast need to comfortable!" Whined Dawn Summers, _Aka Blonde troll, _as she crossed her legs. "Wait, how did you get a computer, if we're out in the forest, in the stark middle of no where?"

"Lit- I'm shocked! You were on-board yesterday!" Gasped Trace, as she stopped her constant typing.

"Yesterday, you were threatening to show my journal to the whole camp.." Dawn grunted, curling up into a ball of pain and pissyness, _yes it's a real word.. Google it_. "Besides, why **-**_**Urgh- **_would I want to write a untrue story about the people I know, and love?"  
Trace got up from her spot on her lumpy mattress, laptop in one hand, and her sword in the other. "Write the story with me, or I'll-"

"You'll what! Stop me from peeing!" The blonde was on the verge of tears, as she wound her legs up tighter.

"Go, just make it quick." Trace sighed, dropping the sword on the floor, completely unfazed by the loud _**THUNK! **_it made.

Apon hearing the words, Dawn was up and gone within seconds, a tearful _'thank you!' _hung in the stale air.

**_- AT THE TOILET! -_**

"Finally.. A break from that madness.." Dawn sighed contently, as she struggled with the fly of her black shorts.

"Who are you talking to?" Came a voice, a very familiar voice, a voice that filled Dawn with dread.. _I guess what I'm trying to say here.. Is that it's Annabeth._

"Uh-Oh, Anna.. It's nothing.. It's just that Trace won't give me a wink of sleep." Dawn felt her heart jump into the pit of her throat, as Anna stared her down with those intense eyes.

"Do you need me to talk to her? I hear she's been getting on everyones last.." Anna pat her on the shoulder, as the two girls made their way back to Dawn's cabin.

"No- No, it's fine.. I'm used to it. She is my BFF-" Dawn shuttered at the silly acronym. "I've known her since, forever.." Once they reached the door, the blonde realized that maybe, just maybe, it wasn't a good idea to let Annabeth follow.

"Why would someone endure such.. _Torture?_" The pretty brunette wondered, as she leaned against the deckpost. "Aren't you in a postion to change cabins?"

"Yeah-" Dawn sighed, kicking a stray piece of wood. "- Tracey is my friend, I can't abandon ship.. _Just yet, anyways.._" Her words sounded genuine, but her hazel eyes read completely different, they just screamed for a way out of this hell that was called rooming with Trace.

"I'll see you later, then..?" Annabeth realized that Dawn wasn't coming without a fight, but decided to let the pleading look in her eyes win.

Dawn half-smiled, before wrapping her arms around the brunette. "Mhm.. Yeah. C'ya." After letting her wise companion free, Dawn's smile widened.

_**- BACK IN THE CABIN! **_-

"Hey, Trace! I'm back.." Dawn stretched, her eyes surveying the room carefully. "Wait a minute!" She choked in horror, Trace and her laptop were missing, _and so was Dawn's journal._ "Why does this keep happening?" Dawn spun on her heel, and ripped the door open.

_**- WHERE IT'S AT! -**_

Trace wandered through the camp, diary and laptop in hand, her face twisted in a wicked grin. _"If she doesn't want to help me.. I guess Percy Jackson needs to know her secret." _

And in the nature of most stories like this one, as soon as Percy Jackson's name is mention, he suddenly appears. He was walking aimlessly, a stupid expression on his face. "Hey, Percy!" Trace waved him over.

"Hey.. Trace.. Aren't you supposed to be-" He blinked, blissfully unaware of her devilish intent. "- Stuck in your cabin all week? Since, you dumped _hot _oatmeal in Dawn's bed.."

Tracelle's smile faltered, before returning lazily. "No- Well.. Shut up! I have something to show you." She tucked the laptop into her armpit, so that she could unlatch, and open the journal. "Um.. I found this fancy little book awhile back.. It's mostly filled with dainty british jabber, but you can find some pretty juicy stuff.."

Percy blinked again, before he liek totally said. "You know, I can't read!" He half-sobbed, a magical southern accent pouring through his words. "Especially if the writing is all proper-like!" With another girlish squeak, the son _-or in this case, the daughter- _of Poseidon took off running, tears left in his wake.

"Per-ceee!" She whined, running after him with no trouble, dispite the fact that her hands were full.

_**- BACK WITH THAT -**_

"Traaaaaaaace!" Called Dawn for the tenth time that moment. "Where could she have gotten off to? This camp isn't the large place in the world.." The blonde rested her hands on her hips. "It shouldn't be too hard to find a girl with light brown hair, green eyes, and no sense of equality."

Just as Dawn was about to hop the little creek, that had formed due to recent thunderstorms, she saw Percy running along the slippery bank.

"Percy! Have you seen Trace?" She waved, running to meet him at the end of the water. "She's made off with my persons, again." Dawn was too busy frowning at the fact that her thick british accent hadn't been written properly, that she didn't notice she was headed straight for a.. _**TREE!**_

"And I don't wa-" _**WHACK! **_"Ugh!" The blonde crumbled to the forest floor, her face reddening, and a nice purple bruise began to form on her brow-bone. "Ow.." She hissed, shielding her injuries.

"Uh- Are you okay?" Percy asked lamely, since he has no genuine feelings for anyone, since the _real writer(s) didn't give a s- _"Do you need some ice?" He kneeled by her side.

"No.. I just need.. I need-" As Dawn paused for dramatics, Trace ran into view, she was waving the Journal high above her head.

"Percy! Get your illiterate rump over here!" Trace tackled her fellow Demi-god, as she peeled the dusty book open. "REEEEEEEAD IT! REEEEAD IT, DANGIT!" She shoved the book into his face.

"Uuugh! You're suffocating meeeee!" Percy coughed, bucking wildy, as I felt that hip throwing was needed in this point in the story. And just as the situation turned from a simple read-to-assault, to an actual sexual-assault situation, Dawn sprung up and had a vision.

"Oh. MY. GOSH!" She shrieked, clutching her burning temples. "I need to see the doctor!" Her knees gave way, and she managed to elbow Trace off of Percy.

"I'm getting out of here! You guys know that I'm afraid of giiiiiirls!" Percy then took the moment to _**scream!**___ And then he ran away.

"Why do _you _need to see the doctor? We have a boy to catch, or a story to write." And with that, Trace grabbed Dawn by the sleeve of her sweater, and dragged her back into camp.

_**- THE END FOR NAO! -**_

**__****Foot note: Thanks for reading! 8D Reviews make me happy, but simple giggles are good, too! **

**__****I'll be back in a bit with the next chapter, sooooo! Hang tight, and have a good weekend.**


	2. And then it all hits the fan

_**Author's note: Ooo, Oo! There's nothing you can do! It's time for Chapter two! :P **_

**_Special thanks to: Nokamiso & Lily Kilara Silver, for being the first to review my story! 3_**

_Last time your were here! Percy fell into horrid stereotypes, Annabeth was intense, Dawn had a vision, and Trace was being.. Tracey-like? .. Lets get on with the story._

"She's going to need plenty of rest, as she is covered head-to-foot in Bad Fanfiction's Disease.." The doctor frowned, snapping the latex glove off his grimey old hands.

"But- Why! My F- I mean.." Trace cleared her throat, as she tried to think of a way to get out of the infirmary without questioning. "Doc, do you like breast?" The honeyette flashed her oddly sized bosom, before escaping stupidly through the window.

"Uh- Those were.. Some weeeeirdly sized knockers.. I wonder she bought them.." The doctor pondered, placing Dawn's chart at the edge of her bed. "Fifty-four Double D's are insane for a girl her size, weight, age, ETC.."

**- MEANWHILE! -**

"Annabeth! Annabeth!" Percy cried, _literaly_, busting through the cabin door. "Trace is being mean to m- Annabeth?" He blinked, as he watched his girlfriend worriedly. She was acting all rapisty on the bed, dressed in nothing but a five-foot long roll of bubblewrap.

"_Daaaawn.. Daaawn!" _She groaned anstily, before shooting Percy a evil glare. "GET OUT! I'm roleplaying!" Annabeth threw a pair of scissors at the boy-who-lived-to-be-the-main-character.

Percy yelped, dodging the sharp projectile. "So.. Bootycalling is out of the question?" He said, after regaining his composure.

"Maybe.. Just.. Get out, please?" She pleaded, her mood swings taking full effect. "You know I've been waiting for time to myself for the loooooongest!" Annabeth began to fuss like a spoiled child.

"Uh-huh.. See you later?" Percy slipped passed the door, whistling suspciously once he was outside. _"I wonder why she was- OH! A butterfly!" _And with that, the young demi-god chased after the poor winged-beauty, like the idiot that people make him out to be.

**- Somewhere beyond infinity! -**

"Hey, Dawna.. How's you feeling?" Asked Luke, as he sauntered sexily into her temporary sleeping area. "You need some _-sexing- _medicine?" He sat on the edge of her bed, tenderly rubbing his hand up her thigh.

"Uuuuuuh.. WTF! Wat r u doin' N huuur?" She drooled, her words sounded just as stupid as they read, as illiteracy is the main disabilty of the disease. "I thawt dat nuuuu 1 waz aLOUD!11?" Dawn suddenly seized up.

"Ah, crap! Is this my fault? I knew I should get'em while they's sleeping.." Luke jumped to his feet, _not before he got a handfull of bewbies, _and clambered out the window, just as the nurses\doctors\sezypeople arrived.

"Oh. MY. GOSH! I've only seen this happen once before!" The new doctor cried, rushing towards the bed. "The normal side of her brain is attacking the BFFD wracked parts! We must do some sur-"

"Whoops, I dropped my burrito on her eye, and she suddenly stopped." Grinned a nervous intern, as she quietly slid into the crowd, dirty burrito in hand.

"Well, Dam- Oh! Hello Ms. Summers! You're finally awake." The doctor cleared her throat.

"Where in the bloody saints am I?" Questioned the blonde, her frightened eye surveyed the room, as she clutched the covers for safety. "And why is there a touch of bean in my tearduct?"

**- Lolz, I ran out of material.. -**

"Why must I be ignored?" Asked a confused, and rather posh sounding, Thalia Grace. "I am a fetching character if I do say so myself!" The young girl lifted a cup of Camomile to her lips.

"Because.. You suck!" Teased a punk Grover, as he began to strip absentmindely on the pole that was installed in Percy's cabin.

"I do indeed 'suck', as I am free-fanny in this story." Thalia took off her blouse, and began gyrating, _like a HookerPirate_, on the bed. "Would you mind ravishing me, dear boy?"

Grover gasped, and proceeded to Pimp-Slap the taste out of Thalia's mouth. "You know I'm gay! And I only have eyes for Trace!" The offended satyr suddenly froze. "But- Then again.. You are FREE!"

They both had a raunchy good time playing Cricket on the backporch.

**- We return to Trace! Finally, I know.. -**

"Dangit, I can't write my story without Dawn! Geez, I gotta go get her.." Trace climbed out of the comfort of her own bed, and began to _slowly, __**and I **__**STRESS**_, _sloooowly, _undress. "But, I first need to get out of these dirty clothes.."

It took about.. Thirty minutes for the young lady to get out of her hoodie, which left her in dark skinny jeans, a pale blue HotTopic T-shirt, an unnecessary acid green tanktop, her pink converse sneakers, yellow boxer cut panties and matching sports bra.

_In other words, she was wearing a LOAD of crap._

"Now, I stand and wait.." She grinned, sloooooowly,_ -Yeah.. This again.-_ peeling off her two shirts in one go. _"I wonder where Percy got off to?"_

And suddenly, the blue-eyed young man was climbing through her window. "Huh? How'd I get in here..?" He was then strangely striken with the inability to balance himself, _even though he's climbed through LOTS of windows, _and he found himself tripping around, before landing safely in the warmth of Trace's melons.

"Ooof!" They choked out in unison, as the two of them crashed to the dirty, _and dare I say splintery_, wooden floor.

"Trace.. Oh, wow.. Those are bigger than Mount Olympus!" Percy mumbled into the tender flesh, as he took in a eyefull of her veiny mounds.

"I know.." She chuckled, her plan was working perfect to a T. _"It was the best grand I've ever spent." _Tracelle shook her head gently, before howling loud enough to break glass. "Help me! HELP ME!" She kicked and screamed, as she weakly attempted to push the boy off.

"Trace.. What're you doing!" Percy assumed the role of 'scared little girl', once more. "Don't get me in trouble!" He began to sob loudly.

Pausing, the girl pretended to think, _but brains are required for that! _"Hmm.. Okay, then.. You must do as I say! Or I tell them you took advantage of me." She smiled wickedly.

"Took advantage? No offense.. But, I have a rockin' girlfriend.. And even though she's crazy, and is normally mentally, emotionally and rationally checked-out.. I STILL LOVE HER!" Percy defended quietly, as he made no move to .. Remove himself from Trace's person.

**- Somewhere else! ;) -**

"Must. Kill. Tracelle, Harmony-McHarkness, Legrace.." Wheezed an unknown Villian, as they stumbled through the forest, blood dripping cooly from unseen wounds. "I. WILL. HAVE. MY. REVENGE!" Suddenly, the writer lost interest in 'em, so they disappeared for the time being.

**- Funky good tiem. -**

Dawn awoke in the safety of her cabin, the sheets had been tucked securely around her body, so she had the hardest time wiggling free. "Uh- Will someone find the time to rescue l'ttle O' me?" She whined after a half-hour of struggling.

"I'll save you.." Grinned Annabeth, as she snuck into the room with a switchblade in hand. "Don't mooove!" The brunette moo'ed like a donkey.

".. Who are you?" Asked the suddenly amnesiac blonde. "Your face is soooo.. Familiar." She lamely thought, _eye_ing the Demi-god before her. "Did we shag?"

"What..?" Annabeth gasped, a hand held to her own heart. "I wish! .. Uh, I mean.. Did you want to?"

**- I bet you're tired of this now.. I am, too.. -**

"Do I really have to do this? Can't we find some other way?" Whined Percy, as he stood right ontop of the water, he was dressed in a pretty little Gothic Lolita dress, and his hair was done-up trampishly.

"Do it, or perish!" Demanded Trace. "DO EET!" Drool began to pour from the corners of her mouth, as the boy began to strip, _just like Thalia taught'em! Oh, she must be proud. _

"I feel dirty.." He began to tear up. "Can I stop? Ooh! Look a horsey!" Percy took off across the water.

"Dangit.. All I got was twenty seconds of me drooling into the lenses.. GET BACK HERE JACKSON!" She called out, chasing after him.

Nico suddenly walked through the trees, he was singing a jolly o' tune, that if listened to correctly, sounded just like a song by-

_**I'm sorry Poseidon! [OOOH]  
I am for real  
Never meant to make your ?**__**Daughter**__**? cry  
I apologize a trillion times  
I'm sorry Sally Jackson! [OOOH]  
I am for real  
Never meant to make your, sissy of a son, cry  
I apologize a trillion times**_

"What.. It was a catchy tune?" He gasped, when he noticed the odd stares that he recieves from _US. _"Besides, Percy's been weird lately.. Infact, none of us have be-" Nico was suddenly banished from the story for the rest of enternity!_  
_

_**Foot note: Thanks for reading! Leave us some oozy reviews, plox! We love to read what you all have to say, good or bad, useful or not.. Oh, btw.. Were about to add a suppah plot-twist! Send in some OC applications, if you want to get more than a little shout-out! We don't bite.. Hard. **_


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